I spent a lot of years trying to change my personality in order to please others. I thought they couldn’t possibly want such a wacky, off-beat, scatter-brained, sometimes shallow and sometimes irreverent woman like me sharing their planet.
So, how I acted depended on what kind of people I was with. With quiet and introspective people, I would smile a lot and nod my head at the intellectual conversation. I would try to say some profound thought of my own lying dormant in my brain. Then I would open my mouth, demonstrate what a fool I was, and prove that I couldn’t please people.
When I was in a group of younger women, I tried to act wise beyond my years. My advice sounded hollow even to me, and I was again met with disappointment from the people around me. With older women, I would act grateful for their recipes and housecleaning tips. Then I would go home and try to do as they had instructed, make a mess, and prove once again I could please no one.
I was a failure at pleasing people, and I was miserable, too. I didn’t understand any of it.
Then one day I found myself in a crowded hospital elevator. My grandmother was critically ill following cancer surgery, and even in my sadness, I was suddenly overtaken by a moment of outrageous joy that made me longing for a good laugh. Before I could help myself, I said, “Excuse me. It’s so crowded in here I can’t move my hands. Would someone with a free hand kindly scratch my nose? … Silence. Oh, dear. I had really done it. I had pleased absolutely no one in that elevator.
But then, the elderly gentleman next to me reached over with his arthritic finger and scratched the end of my nose. We all began laughing and scratching our noses. That was when the elevator doors opened and we faced a group of people waiting to get on. What we must have looked like, I can only imagine. As we piled off, still laughing and scratching, a woman stopped me. She thanked me for making her laugh. She said that laughter was a gift from God and we needed to use it a lot more often.
What? God can use humor? Some people say no, that God is serious, that sending His Son to be born in a manger is serious business, and no laughing matter. How can religious humor be nothing but sacrilegious in light of the sacrifice Jesus made for us?
The truth is, laughter is a good and perfect gift from God. It reduces blood pressure, relieves pain, dissolves anger, and is a universal language. I don’t have to understand why God made me this way, I just have to trust Him to use me, even if it’s through laughter. Even if it’s not pleasing to some people.
So, when the tsk-tskers come my way, not pleased with my humor, I react differently. I smile and say, as sweetly as possible, “Go click your tongue somewhere else.”
Verna Davis, speaker and writer, maybe reached at vrdspeaks@yahoo.com.
Religion
THE JOY LADY: I don’t have to understand why God made me this way
- Religion
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Cross Lane Church accepting shoe donations
Terre Haute residents are invited to donate their shoes to help millions of peopleworldwide with a shoe drive at Cross Lane Community Church on June 2.
- Church briefs: May 18, 2013
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The Joy Lady: A good morning: everything that rises must converge
Last Monday, I had a good morning.
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Unity Presbyterian plans retirement open house
The congregation of Unity Presbyterian Church will stage a retirement celebration open house to honor the church’s pastor, Linda Jo Peters, from 2 to 4 p.m. on May 19 at 1207 E. Springhill Drive.
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Organist will be the featured guest at church
Organist Benjamin Kolodziej will be the featured guest at an organ recital at 4 p.m. on May 19 at Immanuel Evangelical Lutheran Church, 645 Poplar St.
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THE JOY LADY: Call your mom; tell her you love her, that you miss her
In 1914, President Woodrow Wilson signed a resolution proclaiming “the second Sunday in May to be hereafter known as ‘Mother’s Day.’”
- CHURCH BRIEFS: May 11, 2013
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Celebrate the women in your life with The Living Rosary
On Friday, May 10, join the Sisters of Providence of St. Mary-of-the-Woods for The Living Rosary and experience the grace and power many people have discovered by “praying by hand.”
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THE JOY LADY: When awe leaves us, we leave room for doubt
In any given gathering of grade-schoolers or even a gaggle of teenagers, in all likelihood, you will hear certain words over and over:
- CHURCH BRIEFS: May 4, 2013
- RELIGION BRIEFS: May 4, 2013
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Good Friday service today at St. George Orthodox
St. George Orthodox Church at 1900 S. Fourth St., Terre Haute, will celebrate its Good Friday service at 7 p.m. today (May 3) and its Easter service at 9 p.m. Saturday. The Agape (Love) service will be conducted at noon on Sunday.
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Organist’s concert May 5
Organist Jonathan Rudy will be in concert performing works from the 1600’s to the present day at 4 p.m. on Sunday at Central Presbyterian Church, 125 N. Seventh St.
The concert is free and open to the public. -
THE JOY LADY: Christ is coming again. Are you ready for that?
An older couple had a grandfather clock that announced each hour with the ringing of chimes.
- CHURCH BRIEFS: April 27, 2013
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THE JOY LADY: Let us pray that our hearts be blessed by God
Growing up, I spent a lot of time with my uncle and his family in Florida.
- CHURCH BRIEFS: April 20, 2013
- CHURCH BRIEFS: April 13, 2013
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THE JOY LADY: You can learn a lot from a box of crayons
Denis Omar is a handsome third-grader in Ocotillo, Honduras. The last time I was in his home, his colored chalk drawings decorated the concrete block walls. His mother said when she got tired of one drawing, she’d wash the wall and have Denis draw another.
- RELIGION BRIEFS: April 13, 2013
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BBQ fundraiser April 13 at Allen Chapel
Historic Allen Chapel’s annual barbecue dinner fundraiser is Saturday, April 13, in the Chapel at Third and Crawford streets. Serving will be from noon to 6 p.m. with a full-line of dinner, sandwiches, sides and desserts available. Chef Stephen Miller, formerly owner of the Black Skillet and now a caterer in Cincinnati, will again prepare the barbecue.
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THE JOY LADY: Most complaints tend to be pretty selfish
Complainers never think they are in the wrong. How could they be when they know everyone else is so wrong?
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Church briefs: April 6, 2013
What's going on this week at area churches.
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THE JOY LADY: Our attendance in worship services encourages other worshippers
There are all kinds of church attendees. Some attend church services once or twice a month, some once or twice a year. Some attend only Sunday morning worship.
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African children’s choir to perform at Mount Pleasant
The Watoto Children’s Choir, traveling from Africa, began its five-month eastern U.S. tour in Oak Bluffs, Mass., on Oct. 6 and are continuing the tour through Terre Haute, Lebanon, Indianapolis, Peru, Bloomington, Columbus, Evansville and Vevay, from April 16 to May 1. All performances are free and open to the public.
- CHURCH BRIEFS: March 30, 2013
- Religion briefs: March 30, 2013
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THE JOY LADY: Is it time to change your habits, attitudes?
I’m usually introduced to people as “the preacher’s wife.” No name, just “the preacher’s wife.” But I’d prefer being known by what I call my “I am” statements. For instance, I am a wife. I am a speaker, I am a writer. I am a mother, I am a mother-in-law, I am a grandmother.
- CHURCH BRIEFS: March 23, 2013
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Public invited to explore Guerin’s connection to nature
The Sisters of Providence invite the public to St. Mary-of-the-Woods on April 6 to explore Saint Mother Theodore Guerin and her connection to nature.
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