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November 16, 2009

Ms. Takes: Family ghost story a good tale any time of year

By Liz Ciancone The Tribune Star Mon Nov 16, 2009, 09:03 PM EST

TERRE HAUTE — It’s too late for Halloween, but the holiday reminded me of our family ghost story.

During the last 10 or 20 years of Dad’s life, he developed a close friendship with Mr. Sibley. They met in an unusual way. Mr. Sibley rarely left the small town of Matthews, Mo., and Dad lived some 25 miles north at Sikeston. But Dad liked Matthews and, especially after Mom died, sought conversation with the “hot stove league” at the Matthews general store.

Mr. Sibley’s son owned the store, but somehow he and Dad were never around that stove at the same time. However, one day as Dad left, Mr. Sibley asked his son, “Who is that man who just left?” And, upon learning Dad’s name, Mr. Sibley announced, “I want to meet him. He and I were brothers in a former life.”

Dad met people easily, but usually only superficially. It was unusual that he and Mr. Sibley became close friends. Dad spent more and more time in Matthews where there was always a place for him at the Sibley table. When Dad was diagnosed with lung cancer, he underwent treatment at a Veterans Hospital in Memphis. We visited him there during the first round of treatments when he was still able to get out of the hospital and around town with us. Our sons were little then and while No. 1 son and my Best Friend were riding some sort of sky lift, No. 2 son was treated to a coupon book to ride on some of the tamer attractions. Dad and I talked.

He was allowed to go home and was able to attend a reunion of his Navy buddies before having to return to the hospital for a second round of treatments. As he headed south, he left his car with Mr. Sibley. He was never able to reclaim it.

At Dad’s funeral, Mr. Sibley approached me and, between tears, he told me that Dad had come to say goodbye to him.

“I was sitting in the living room late one afternoon. I looked up and saw your Dad at the door,” he said. “I turned and shouted to my wife to set another plate because Ed was here for supper, but when I turned back, he was gone. I told my wife, ‘Ed died today.’” And, he had.

There was a closeness to that friendship Dad felt with few others. I believe Mr. Sibley saw Dad.

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Liz Ciancone

• LIZ CIANCONE: A little bit of cursive comes in handy

  Good grief. What next?
  I read recently that there is a movement underfoot to cease teaching cursive writing in the public schools. I understand that this is merely a suggestion and is optional, but still …
   

  February 14, 2012  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Give pets the gift of a better, longer life

  It’s amazing how many of us at the Family Sports Center are involved with pets. But I recently became aware of how involved some of us have become.
   

  February 7, 2012  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Super Bowl festivities mostly for super rich

  I hate being in a minority, but I guess I am. I am considerably less than thrilled over having the Super Bowl altogether too close to my back yard.
   

  January 31, 2012  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Catalog this mail as junk

  On or about Dec. 1, I picked up the mail to find three Christmas cards along with an unusual spate of catalogs. The cards reminded me that mine were still in the bottom drawer of the desk waiting to be addressed. I appreciated that.
   

  January 24, 2012  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Up close and personal with Da Bears' Mike Ditka

  Mark Bennett’s delightful story of how his son acquired Barry Larkin’s autograph reminded me of how Number Two son scored the signature of Mike Ditka.
   

  January 17, 2012  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Small-town kids were naive, but not stupid

  I told my Best Friend the other day that I thought I’d write about growing up stupid. “We weren’t stupid,” said he, “we were just sheltered and naive.” He’s right. We had no idea that there were people and things in the world that would want to hurt us.
   

  January 10, 2012  

• LIZ CIANCONE: She’s all for spacing out those holidays

  That swooshing sound you heard may not have been the wind. It was me! I was breathing a sigh of relief that the holidays are over until the next time.
   

  January 3, 2012  

• MS. TAKES: Some look forward to spring and garage sales

  We are officially into winter and just days after the longest day of the year. We can begin counting the days until spring and can look forward to waking up to a bit of sun.
   

  December 27, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Let gifts to lawmakers help cut the deficit

  In the holiday spirit of giving, I’d like to pass along to Congress a tip I ran across in my reading. If adopted, it would enable the competing parties in Washington, D.C. to enhance federal income without raising taxes or reducing social programs.
   

  December 20, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Pujols’ gift list overflows — for now, at least

  It’s going to be a Merry Christmas for the Albert Pujols family this year!
   

  December 13, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: How much 'twinkle' do we need for holidays?

  I had an especially dear friend who went into a blue funk in Christmas season. She once threatened to spell out “Bah, Humbug!” in twinkle lights on her lawn.
   

  December 6, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Work's not a 'right', it's a necessity

  I understand the Indiana Legislature intends to work to produce a “right to work” bill this coming session.
   

  November 29, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Holidays bring on baking duties

  Somehow, in the vast scheme of things, I have ended up point person for holiday baking.
  I know how it happened. Mom was a great cook. I’d give almost anything if I had found her recipe for raisin sugar cookies or the chocolate-orange cake. She turned out coffee cakes, sweet rolls, bread, butterfly rolls and sweet surprises. We always had dessert.
   

  November 22, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Keeping track of a tattered underworld

  Mom always told me to be sure I never left the house with torn or dirty underwear. She usually added a warning about being hit by a truck or a bus, or some other catastrophe befalling, so that I’d be carted off to the hospital where my tattered underwear would become a matter of public record and private shame.
   

  November 15, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: So far, this is a poor excuse for debate

  I don’t know about you, but I’ve seen enough “debates” to last the rest of my natural life.
   

  November 8, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Sounds of silence are now hard to find

  Is there anyplace left where there is no noise — other than the comforting noises of nature?
   

  October 25, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Grueling trips, but we were together

  Family vacations were a given. Dad usually had a 10-day vacation every summer and the only question was where we would go for the best fishing.
   

  October 18, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Lure of the stage gets in your veins

  When I cast my memory back far enough, it seems as if I have always been stage struck.
  As a first-grader, I was picked to play a child in the senior class play at Stockton High School. Maybe it was my pigtails? I only knew that I was excused from class early on several afternoons a week so that I could rehearse with the big kids.
   

  October 11, 2011 1 Photo  

• MS. TAKES: They’re gone, but their music is not forgotten

  Dad believed that if it wasn’t composed by John Philip Sousa or Victor Herbert, it simply wasn’t music. Imagine his reaction to Woody Herman or — gasp — Stan Kenton!
   

  October 4, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Uncle Ed’s mule Maud was faithful work mate

  I like horses. Really! I do. I like them best seen from the windows of a car as they graze in a lovely spring pasture. I even like them on television as they do a parade lap before the start of a major race. But I draw the line at a second experience on the back of a horse.
   

  September 27, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Rules would be fine, if they made more sense

  I was pleased to read that the Department of Homeland Security plans to ease up on airport checkpoints. Not for the likes of you and me, but there will be no more “pat downs” of small children. Wee ones won’t even have to take off their shoes.
   

  September 20, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: 2 women’s strength of character unforgettable

  Remember the old “Readers’ Digest” feature: “The Most Unforgettable Character I Ever Met?”

  September 13, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Memories of 9/11: Hairpin vapor trails

  Those of us who have been around awhile remember a lot of stuff. Not only do critical moments in our lives loom large, we also remember exactly where we were and what we were doing when history was being made.
   

  September 6, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Today’s girls have more opportunity than ever

  I confess. I had a bit of a battle with the green-eyed monster the other morning. The newspaper had pictures of high school girls playing soccer with a team from another school, and with obvious joy and pleasure.
   

  August 30, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Lesson 1: School is not a drag

  Not long ago I ran across an old letter I had written to Dad when I was five years old. He had saved it!
   

  August 23, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Charter schools won’t solve all of education’s problems

  A friend asked me the other day what I thought of Tony Bennett.
   

  August 16, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Coming to grips with typing technology

  I was asked the other day if I still used a typewriter.
   

  August 9, 2011 1 Photo  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Missing the wishing inside the catalogs

  Only 24-hours after returning from vacation, our mail person delivered a two-week accumulation of mail. Our mailbox overflowed!
   

  August 2, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Achoo! Summer cold is something to sneeze at!

  Of all the miseries visited upon mankind, I think that the summer cold wins the door prize!
  My Best Friend and I opened our third box of tissues Sunday, a BIG box, not your handy, pocket-size job. We added tissues to the shopping list assuming that one or the other of us will soon feel like getting out. I know I’m ready to go someplace, ANYplace, as long as it’s out!
   

  July 26, 2011  

• LIZ CIANCONE: Haven’t we seen you somewhere before?

  I’ve heard it said that everyone has a doppleganger — a look-alike — and if that’s true, I suppose that somewhere in the world is a person who looks enough like me to be mistaken for me. Maybe it would take a dim light, or a vivid imagination, but for what it’s worth …

  July 20, 2011 1 Photo  

• More Liz Ciancone Headlines

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