By Liz Ciancone
My Best Friend thinks my family is a little nutty. It must be the practical jokes!
Dad was once in Chicago for an early meeting and decided to greet the dawn by rousin’ his brother. Uncle Jim worked nights, so slept late. Dad pounded on the door and succeeded in getting someone to open the door.
“Tell Mr. Cook that the piano tuner is here,” he said.
She was persuaded to do just that and, in the ensuing grumbling, Dad heard, “My God, Madge. I don’t know.” But he slipped into a flannel robe and a pair of slippers and the joke was enjoyed with coffee all around.
Dad was good at jokes, but Uncle Jim was the master. As a public relations man, he spent a lot of time on what he called “the chicken and peas circuit”. One group out west somewhere thought they’d play a joke on this city slicker and took him out to a mountain stream to pan gold. Jim had lost a gold filling, so while he dipped and swirled, he surreptitiously dropped the filling into his pan.
“Is this what it looks like?” he asked.
A lot of frantic swirling ensued with hopes aroused.
I liked the joke he played on Aunt Madge. She had been out of town and when she flew home, Jim was to meet her at Midway Airport.
In preparation, Jim went to a couple of florists and bought dozens of day-old roses. He lined up a few kids to rush to the plane when Madge appeared. One had a camera, several demanded her autograph, another proffered the roses. Madge looked around hoping to spot the celebrity before it dawned on her that it was another of Jim’s pranks.
But the classic was the day he went into a music store to get out of a driving rain. As the only potential customer, he got a lot of attention. He asked to see a set of bagpipes and was told they had none in stock, but soon the entire staff was at the counter pawing through catalogs.
When the rain stopped, Jim walked out leaving them still going through the catalogs.
Maybe my family IS a little nutty. I tell my BF that — at least — I am not a practical joker.
Liz Ciancone is a retired Tribune-Star reporter. Send e-mail to opinion@tribstar.com.
