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January 9, 2006

Kegler's Korner: Bowling rarely spared when it comes to the silver screen

By Dennis Clark

TERRE HAUTE — Through the years, bowling has rarely been portrayed in a favorable light on the silver screen.

Any progress achieved from the two highest-rated “bowling” movies in the past few years literally went right down the gutter with the recent 40-minute DVD film release of “Life in the Bowling Lane.”

It’s producers describe this short film as “a nonstop, fast-paced comedy romp.” The film brings together the “talents” of The Unknown Comic — remember him from the old “Gong Show”? — and comedian Bob Zany — whose credits include the “Tonight Show” and is heard regularly on radio’s Bob and Tom Show with his “Zany Report.”

Your basic “boy meets girl, girl dumps boy, girl hooks up with another boy” plot is combined with bowling. The producers hope this film does for bowling what actor Tim Conway’s “Dorf” character did for golf.

I highly doubt it.

Television has done a bit more justice to bowling. Bowling-related plots that come to mind on TV screen include shows such as “Ed”, “Andy Griffith Show” and “Home Improvement.”

But we’re talking bowling in movies.

The two most recognized “bowling” movies of all time are the recent comedies “The Big Lebowski” and “Kingpin,” created from the fertile comic minds of the Farrelly brothers and Coen brothers, respectively.

My two favorite “bowling-related” scenes from the “The Big Lebowski” — there were a lot to choose from — find Jeff Bridges (the Dude) lying prone on the ground wearing a Walkman headset, listening to a cassette tape labeled “Venice Beach League Playoffs 1987” as the viewer tinnily hears the impact of a bowling ball hitting the pins.

A second personal favorite involves John Goodman (ex-Vietnam vet Walter Sobchak) pulling out a gun from his bowling bag to settle a dispute over whether or not an opposing player made a foot foul.

And how can you not like simple, loyal and kind Donny (portrayed by Steve Buscemi) who gave his life for bowling?

“Kingpin” has its moments as well, with Woody Harrelson (Roy Munson), Randy Quaid (Amish boy Ishmael Boorg) and Bill Murray (Ernie McCracken). However, if you look closely, one of Munson’s strikes he rolled in the film defies all laws of physics.

Meanwhile, the controversial Michael Moore film, the inappropriately titled “Bowling for Columbine,” certainly wins hands-down with the most hits while researching bowling movies on the Internet.

The only connection “Bowling for Columbine” has to bowling is that the two shooters, Eric Harris and Dylan Klebold, were enrolled in a 6 a.m. bowling class as a high school gym elective. It’s unfortunate that bowling has to take a direct “hit” — whether or not Harris or Klebold were actually at the bowling class that tragic day in 1999 is immaterial — when it had nothing whatsoever to do with the reasons behind the Columbine killings.

Gangster movies have frequently utilized bowling alley backdrops for dramatic effect.

How about “Scarface” (1931), not the more-famous Al Pacino movie that has become popular all over again with a whole new generation? In the earlier film — more detailed in 93 minutes than the very long, albeit more entertaining, 170-minute remake — Boris Karloff has a memorable bowling alley scene.

“St. Valentine’s Day Massacre” (1967) is another, and who can forget “Cape Fear” (again the original, not the remake) with ex-con Robert Mitchum terrorizing a lawyer, Gregory Peck, and his wife and children inside a bowling alley?

Here are other movies I’ve come across with a bowling theme, and certainly are listed in no particular order as to good, fair or downright awful:

n “Flintstones” starring the aforementioned John Goodman (Fred Flintstone) and Rick Moranis (Barney Rubble) in a Bedrock bowling scene, and “Uncle Buck,” with the late John Candy, has a great bowling scene too.

n “Racing with the Moon (1984) starring Sean Penn and Nicolas Cage starting out as a pair of pinsetters in a four-lane bowling alley.

n “That Night” (1992) stars Juliette Lewis as a teenager falling in love with the counter boy at a local bowling alley.

n In the campy genre, how about “Nude Bowling Party (1995) or “Sorority Babes in the Slimeball Bowl-O-Rama (1988)”?

n “Mystery Men” (1999) with Janeane Garofalo, whose crime-fighting weapon is the skull of her deceased father encased in a golden bowling ball.

n “Greedy” (1994), starring Michael J. Fox as a unsuccessful pro bowler and his rich uncle Kirk Douglas. Pro bowlers Parker Bohn III, Mark Roth and others have cameo appearances.

n “Dreamer” (1979) starring Tim Matheson as a down-on-his luck bowler, then competes in a PBA championship match against a childhood hero.

n “Hustler of Money” (1988), a lesser parody of Fast Eddie in “Color of Money” (the remake, not the Steve McQueen original), including Ben and Jerry Stiller, Danny Aiello and Julie Hagerty.

n Two convoluted plot movies, “Spare Me” (1992) and “Striker Bob” (1997). The first involves a pro bowler being banned from competition after conking an opponent on the head with a bowling ball, then works his way back into the game, while the second, a Dutch film short, involves two brothers confessing to drowning an opponent before a big match.

n “A League of Ordinary Gentlemen” (2004) has been mentioned before in this column. A documentary of PBA bowling from the 1950s-’60s to the current time, following Pete Weber, Walter Ray Williams Jr., Chris Barnes and Wayne Webb.

I I I

n The Professional Bowler’s Association Central Region Tour returns to Imperial Lanes for the second year in a row, according to the PBA’s Web site, with the this year’s dates set for July 21-23.

More details will be forthcoming.

n The Ohio Valley Bowlers Tour, formerly the Old Timer’s Tour, is at the Terre Haute Bowling Center at 1 p.m. today.

n A reminder. Please submit scores or tournament results to the address noted below.



Dennis Clark can be reached by e-mail at dennis.clark@tribstar.com; by mail at P.O. Box 149, Terre Haute, IN 47808; or by fax at (812) 231-4321.



Vigo County

Bowling Leagues

Terre Haute Bowling Center

Affordable Awards Mixed — High games: Edward Gowgiel 277, Melissa Dressler 254, Bowlers Pro Shop 800. High series: Billy Furry 690, Janie Martin 566, Bowlers Pro Shop 2,183.

Chandler Construction — High games: Chad Wasnidge 256, Melinda Helmick 236, Wasnidge Racing 758. High series: Wasnidge 647, Patricia Stewart 495, Wasnidge Racing 2,186.

THBC Prime Timers — High games: Larry Auler 266, Ruth Frey 219. High series: Richard Stephens 708, Barbara Terrell 545.

Ang Mixed — High games: Shane Mullenix 242, Patty McWilliams 196, Big Dogs 750. High series: Mullenix 669, Jodi Moan and Tami Saylor 530, Big Dogs 2,079.

C&E; Environmental — High games: Steve Owens 288, Brazil Auto Plex 1,050. High series: Owens 724, Brazil Auto Plex 3,058.

Prime Timers — High games: Guy Belzile 224, Judy Meng 222. High series: Dale Liggett 611, Meng 584.

Guarantee Roofing — High games: Harley Jones 279, Affordable Awards 1,141. High series: Jones 763, Affordable Awards 3,282.

Affordable Awards Ladies — High games: Julie Salyer 209, Honey Creek Honey’s 844. High series — Lynn Bolinger 571, Honey Creek Honey’s 2,459.

Toyota of Terre Haute — High games: Mike Fisher Sr. 256, Gentlemen’s Club 1,105. High series: Larry Lemons 682, Gentlemen’s Club 3,058.

Gartland Foundry — High games: Gregory Taylor 235, Peggy Clery 199, Shadows 743. High series: John Bullis 595, Clery 530, Conley’s Wildcats 2,087.

Vigo Bowl

Affordable Awards — High games: Paula Pierce 233, Holiday Inn 885. High series: Marjorie Clark 543, Clean Sweep Plus 2,458.

Great American Car Wash — High games: Cindy Robinson 215, Morris Gun Shop 823. High series: Robinson 589, Morris Gun Shop 2,333.

John Curry Lanes (Elks)

Monday Mens — High games: Phil Cooper and J.C. Dressler 246, Williams Plumbing and Heating 1,053. High series: Cooper 656, Williams Plumbing and Heating 2,857.

Thursday Mens — High games: Ray Sumner Jr. 237, American Beverage Center 920. High series: Greg Athey 638, McGuire Excavating 2,609.

Tuesday Mens — High games: Phil Cooper 278, Greenleaf 1,063. High series: Cooper 699, Wallace Andrews 2,975.

Imperial Lanes

Archie’s Sports Bar — High games: Dave Brown and Chris Wooden 258, Stuckeys 1,161. High series: John Walton 696, Stuckeys 3,198.

Tuesday Morning Ladies — High games: Ruth St. Peter 198, Ole Ladies 480. High series: St. Peter 518, Ole Ladies 1,385.

Austins Bar Thursday Mixed — High games: Harold Harris 247, Teresa Shepherd 183, Fitzpatrick Pearce 958. High series: Tod Harris 680, Mandy Klopfenstein 501, Austins 2,758.

Wabash Valley Speed and Performance — High games: Chris Wooden 279, WIMS 1,193. High series: J.C. Dressler 761, WIMS 3,278.

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